It can be gone...

I know you are near
even thou there are so many obstacles
in between.

I know you can hear
even if I just quietly whisper deep down
in my heart.

There's so many pathways
so many distractions all around.

But I know there's only one way
only one that leads to where you
can be found.

Oh God please hear me
I cry for my friends.

Oh Father dear teach me
to trust you that you will show them.

The right way
the love of your heart.
The only path
to the cross of your Son.

I praise you for your mercy.
I thank you for your love.

Please Father show them your forgiveness
and give them eyes to see.
What it means to be lost in our own ways
and that you want them to be

Your children just as your Son.
To see you as Father who wants them and have done,

the greatest miracle of all
and wishes they come
As broken and as repentant
as has caused the past that can be gone...

Handicap by heart

I'm handicap by heart.

Oh Father in heaven, forgive me
as I cry so heartbreaking
cause I can't find that picture
of being loved from the inside.

I thank you for your love and mercy.
I know so well I'm nothing without you.

You saw me. I was because you loved.

Thank you for pulling me out of that
darkness. Even thou you well knew
that sometimes the sorrow over it
comes to me and tries to overwhelm me.

Thank you for knowing that and understanding.
Thank you for your support and strength.

I'm lost without you.
Don't ever let me get to far...

No one knows my sorrow. It doesn't show.
Comparing to anything here, it's nothing.

Even thou there are so many ways
we are injured on the inside.
Playing our roles as normal as capable...
But breaking up and hurting.

You know it all. You want to help us all.

in the blood of your Son, is the power
to overcome and get healed.

Thank you. Amen.

13.12.2015

Surface

I'm rising above the horizon.
I fly like an eagle.
Seeing clearly. High above
doubts and despair.

I rely on you.
I know you lead.
You won't forsake.
Your mercy stays forever.


I don't need to go below
the surface anymore.
And even if I do, you'll be there.

Your hand will hold on.
And your voice is guiding me.
You give me strength to go on.

19.8.2015

Lilly's of the valley

No amount of noise
can shut down the
             conscience.

There ain't desert wide enough
to hide from your quilt.

Do you really think you're gonna
get rest in the mansions of death?

-Give yourself a brake and wake up.

Smell the Lilly's of the valley.
See the bird on the sky.
Say sorry when you've hurt someone.
And speak the truth even if you die.

-Show some respect for yourself and others.
-Show some gratitude for the life you got.

There's only one lifetime for you to decide.
There's only way, or another.
Only one of them leads to real life.

13.8.2015

I'm bad

"I can't be the bad guy."
- said Heisenberg in Breaking Bad.
(Walter White).

And I realized: I am the bad guy.

Awhile before, the younger partner
learned that we need to accept ourselves
as we are and how self-low and shame
keeps us from the TRUE CHANGE.

I am bad. And I don't even know
the worst of it.
But the climbs I've seen about myself:
WOW!! I REALLY DON'T WANT TO
KNOW WHAT I WOULD OR COULD
BE WITHOUT GOD'S GRACE!!!

So. By admitting what I am without Him
and by forgiving myself and learning to
love myself, on the ground that HE LOVES
ME AND WANTS ME AND HAS FORGIVEN
ME, I'm going to go through THE TRUE CHANGE
and find out: WHAT I CAN BE WITH and IN HIM.

Bit by bit the old man is going to DIE.
In fact, she is already dead, but the renewing
my mind accordingly by His Word, is another story...

AND TODAY I DECIDE TO TAKE THAT ROAD
AND GO THROUGH WITH IT TO THE END.

No matter what comes along and what it costs.

I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW, HOW BAD
I'M GONNA BE, IF I'M LEFT WITHOUT HIM!!!

11.8.2015

High places

Tough call.
How we dance around this
                table of life.

Views are changing.
Decision after decision.

So wide lack of knowledge
and understanding about it's rules.

And everyone of us forced to
lay in the bed he himself prepares.


Sometimes we might find a high place
to see things more clearly, farther than
 usually and for a while we might get
going on more easily or wisely... but
being who we are... by forced to come
down from those places... after awhile
we forget.     All clarity gone. Old
blinders back on their places. Easier
that way, even if it hurts like hell...


Dear Lord All Mighty! Strengthen my
faith in you. Re-establish the trust to
your Word and clear my ears to hear,
my heart to obey...

So where ever I go, what ever I do,
it is your Word I rely on in my
decisions, your Spirit I hears who
guides me.

I don't need those high places anymore.
I'm yours and I can trust you. Amen.

You love me!

I have life.
I don't waste it.
I will use it to glorify God.
I will tell the whole world
about your mercy and love.

How you've supported me
by keeping my faith and
lifting me up and guiding
my heart towards you
step by step.
Decision by decision.

You love me. In Jesus
I have a way and strength
to walk my line. Those
steps you've made for me.
Thank you Father.

10.8.2015